Why

I am reading couple books on marriage and relationships, which I should have read years ago. Apparently, we have made all the mistakes by the book, lol. We are still here, so that is a great chance to patch things up and get it right from now on. That includes changing old habits, changing your expectations and taming your emotions. If only it was done as easily as listing it. Hahahaha
Small steps. Small steps lead to big changes, over time. The trick is being consistent. Before, I failed to recognize the fault, now I recognize it right before, during or shortly after committing it, lol. The next step is to stop it before happening and then being more rational about issues so I don't get the itch.
Just a reminder that I have made it to the last step a few times in different issues. I just need to be consistent and stop blaming myself for little mishaps. I am not at fault all the time. I am just vulnerable to guilt trips. I need to shake off the urge to keep everyone happy and satisfied with me. The need to please is my soft spot which has been manipulated over and over before. Mere realization of your weaknesses will be totally useless if not paired with serious efforts to change and improve. It will be like reading a book over and over but not gaining any knowledge from it. So now, I should stop burdening myself with tension just cause someone isn't momentarily happy with me. I should be able to brush it off and have fun. After all that is what growing up is about; not ignoring problems, but not being intimadated by them and not hanging on to them.
Idk why, all of a sudden all this sounds like a load of crap, repetitive and redundant.

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