From Afghanistan to America, crossroads of life

I have been having some personal hard times the last few days in spite of many hopes in my life. Story of my life:) Today, I got so frustrated with the marital complications that I thought if I can fast forward my life at least one year, I might be in a better place and time. Is that true? It might be, but I highly doubt it. So far, what I have learned from life is that there is no shortage of turmoil and trouble in any stage of you life. Single or married, with or without child, rich or poor, work or school, close to family or away from loved ones, married to the man of your dreams of someone with rough edges, you will always have problems. This fact doesn't minimize the implications and intensity of your current problems though. Just because you will have troubles next year doesn't mean this year's problems are trivial. What I have learned from life that it is a constant struggle with hardly any breaks in between. So what is one to do? You can't run away from your pro...

How do you distract yourself? At times, we need some kind of healthy distraction from our stubborn thoughts and emotions. I am talking about times when you distinctly know better but are feeling ambivalent. Your head is very logical but you can't get your emotions and actions aligned to behave logically. At such times, I feel that distraction is a much better option than digging deeper into the situation. So how to distract myself? Let's explore my options.

Some people dream more frequently than other. By "dream" I am referring to dreaming at night in your sleep. Some have short dreams and some have very long episodes of dreams which fall somewhere in between normal and crazy range. I always dream. There are barely dream-free nights for me. And my dreams are crazy, long and tiring. I found out my brother has the same characteristic. I wonder if it is genetic. My sisters complain of long and tiring dreams at times too. On the other hand, my husband rarely has dreams and they usually short. I haven't read much about dreams and their meanings as applicable to real life, but when you dream every night, it is hard to keep up with. So I probably won't even bother. But there are some things that are being repeated in my dreams and I want to know their significance in my life. For example, I am terrified of snakes and heights. In my dreams, I am usually falling from high places or dealing with snakes. Everyone else around me see...

I am starting to realize the power of money on any relationship and especially on marriage. You would  think love and understanding and communication are the top rescue ropes of a marriage. But financial difficulty can undermine all this. Whether make more money of live below your means in order to eliminate this risk factor of chaos in your marriage. This is a much bigger problem in western worlds than eastern. In Afghanistan, there is less materialism and fewer bills to be paid than in America. Also since the power struggle has already been settled down in favor of husband, the wife has one less issue to worry about. Less authority, fewer responsibilities. That translates into less stress and more peace of mind. Of course, that comes with a price, but then again you always pay a price for something more meaningful in your life. Then it comes down to what is the price of a peaceful mind? What will you give up to be less stressed? Here in the US we try to be in ...

I haven't made an entry in so long in spite of my dramatic life. Well, since it was turning into those daily soap opras, I couldn't bear to talk about it. It is embarrassing to have that kind of life. It is scary when your worst fears come true, you have a rocky relationship, you are told you are exactly like your mother (and you kinda see the similarities too), your child start rebelling at much younger age than expected, you get dumped upon a ton of unwanted responsibilities,  you lose your cool in the midst of all this and etc. Obviously I have been struggling with this for the past couple years of my life at least. Striking a balance between your roles, your obligations and expectations is the hardest thing. I am sure I am not alone. I know a lot of people, if not everyone, is struggling with creating a balance. It is easier for those who don't have many roles, not involved in various relationships and projects in life. If you have a job, financial stability (not nece...